Come On, Admit It -- You're Happy, Right?
Did you know that August 8th is the 5th Annual "National Admit You're Happy Day?" And that the entire month is "National Admit You're Happy Month?" Really, it is. And it's sponsored by The Secret Society of Happy People. (You're laughing. We can hear you.) Although that may sound like a parody, it's not. It's a real organization whose founder, Pam Johnson, has debated happiness's status as politically incorrect on -- where else? -- POLITICALLY INCORRECT, promoted the rights of happy people in interviews in the WASHINGTON POST, PEOPLE, and on CNN, and has chronicled her experiences in her self-published book DON'T EVEN THINK OF RAINING ON MY PARADE. Johnson, a former sales rep for an independent book publisher, is now at work on a self-help book, HAPPILY CO-EXISTING WITH CHAOS, and continuing her work reaching out to happy people everywhere whose cheerfulness isn't always appreciated by family, friends or the boss.
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Much Ado About Publishing
PUBLISHERS ARE FROM MARS
How do you know if you’ve been reading entirely too much spirituality, metaphysical, and self-help literature? If you own, have read, or wrote any of these books:
- The Tao of Flossing
- Insect Astrology for Lovers
- The Vegetarian’s Guide to Car Repair
- Rearranging Your Face: The Feng Shui of Cosmetic Surgery
- Ten Easy Steps to Becoming an Ancient Egyptian
- Fetus Fitness: Yoga in the Womb
- Tantric Housework: Ecstatic Spring Cleaning
- That’s Mayan: How to Profit from a Long-Lost Civilization
- Oy Vay, Don’t Ask: 4,000 Years of Kabbalah Secrets
- India on $5-a-Year or Less
- Cooking with Fish Tank Algae
- Sit on a Mountain and Starve: The Dalai Lama’s Ultimate Diet
- I Died and Went Nowhere: The Skeptic’s Guide to Reincarnation
- Monk…y Business: How to Run a Successful Monastery
- Soulercize: How to Exercise Your Soul While You Sleep
- Hot Date: How to Get Lucky in a Native American Sweat Lodge
Don’t despair, you can recover, but beware of the signs of relapse:
- You’ve named your dog Deepak.
- You try to program people from your past lives into your telephone’s speed dial.
- You’ve ordered bifocals for your third eye.
- You’ve just bought the CD “Whales Sing the Best of Broadway.”
You’ll know you’re on your way to recovery when you can honestly agree with the following statements:
- You don’t remember if women are from Venus and men are from Mars, or women are from Mars and men are from Venus.
- Your soul has lost its taste for chicken soup and now craves a nice bowl of New England Clam Chowder.
- You think you’re just swell and everyone else is nuts.
You’ll know you’ve really got this recovery thing under control when you write the book The Self-Help Addict’s Guide to Recovering From Self-Help Book Addiction, it’s picked up for representation by a William Morris agent, sold (after a frenzied bidding war) to Mr. Important Editor at the mega publishing house HarperRandomSimon for a high seven-figure advance, lands on The New York Times bestseller list, and stays there longer than any of the self-help books you’ve ever read.
Of course, then you’ll have to run out and buy When Enlightenment Strikes: How to Survive Becoming an Instant Guru When Your Book Hits Number One.
Oh, well, so much for recovery.
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Nina L. Diamond is a journalist, essayist, and the author of Voices of Truth: Conversations with Scientists, Thinkers & Healers. Her work has appeared in numerous publications, including Omni, The Los Angeles Times Magazine, The Chicago Tribune, and The Miami Herald.
Ms. Diamond was a writer and performer on Pandemonium, the National Public Radio (NPR) satirical humor program, for its entire run in Miami and select markets nationwide from 1984-1998. As an editor, she works frequently with other authors and journalists on both fiction and non-fiction.
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Logo image courtesy of George Glazer Gallery, NYC georgeglazer.com